So, this Liebster thing: Aaargh!
I should have known from the beginning that no emotional good could come of it. I’m an anxious second-guesser at the best of times, I don’t need extra things to fret about.
In the post I wrote about my blog award ambivalence, I linked to the people I read and like and deserve some praise and attention. I didn’t have time to send all of those people a personal message to let them know at the time, though some of them happened to see the post and either declined or accepted as they saw fit.
I’ve been busy so it was only this afternoon that I sat down to write a short email to the other folks on the list and…
I hated it!
I’m the world’s worst networker and, today when I recognized a friend of the mister who I’ve only met a couple of times, I rushed on like I was late for something just to avoid the smalltalk I’m so horrible at.
I wish I wasn’t so uncomfortable and embarrassed about every little thing…. but these kind of things are just not me at all, and I feel like my first instincts were right. I know it’s meant to be harmless fun and I hate being such a curmudgeon but I just felt so uncomfortable ‘cold-calling’ a complete stranger asking them to take part in a thing where they then have to ‘cold-call’ another bunch of strangers. It wasn’t fun for me. It felt spammy and ick and, even though I was telling them it was because I like their writing, it felt false though the sentiment was sincere.
Anyway, I couldn’t bring myself to email the other people which makes me even more insane I know! If they see the link to their name and want to take part then, of course, that’s splendid. But I can’t face writing another “hey, I like you, and check out why on my blog” emails, even if it’s to say great things.
And I only have great things to say about those writers: I hope that people find their blogs through my links, but that should have been as far as I went with it. I did have some fun with it in fairness, I liked answering the questions and it brought back lots of funny, silly memories. I appreciate that Janet thought of me. But I kind of deep down knew that I would not like sending those emails, though perhaps folk would be happy to receive them….
I know that at least two bloggers were pleased that I thought of them and that makes me feel good…. or at least not-bad! So I look forward still to hearing from Diane Prokop and Trish at weebookblog. You’re better sports than I am ladies!
Anyway… Thus concludes my latest anxiety attack about the silliest of things. This particular post probably gives you more insight into the ‘wonder’ that is Deborah than the Eleven Things About Me piece.
Thanks for listening folks 🙂 x