Sheesh!

August 18, 2012 § 9 Comments

So, this Liebster thing: Aaargh! 

I should have known from the beginning that no emotional good could come of it. I’m an anxious second-guesser at the best of times, I don’t need extra things to fret about.

In the post I wrote about my blog award ambivalence, I linked to the people I read and like and deserve some praise and attention. I didn’t have time to send all of those people a personal message to let them know at the time, though some of them happened to see the post and either declined or accepted as they saw fit.

I’ve been busy so it was only this afternoon that I sat down to write a short email to the other folks on the list and…

and…

I hated it!

I’m the world’s worst networker and, today when I recognized a friend of the mister who I’ve only met a couple of times, I rushed on like I was late for something just to avoid the smalltalk I’m so horrible at.

I wish I wasn’t so uncomfortable and embarrassed about every little thing…. but these kind of things are just not me at all, and I feel like my first instincts were right. I know it’s meant to be harmless fun and I hate being such a curmudgeon but I just felt so uncomfortable ‘cold-calling’ a complete stranger asking them to take part in a thing where they then have to ‘cold-call’ another bunch of strangers. It wasn’t fun for me. It felt spammy and ick and, even though I was telling them it was because I like their writing, it felt false though the sentiment was sincere.

Anyway, I couldn’t bring myself to email the other people which makes me even more insane I know! If they see the link to their name and want to take part then, of course, that’s splendid. But I can’t face writing another “hey, I like you, and check out why on my blog” emails, even if it’s to say great things.

And I only have great things to say about those writers: I hope that people find their blogs through my links, but that should have been as far as I went with it. I did have some fun with it in fairness, I liked answering the questions and it brought back lots of funny, silly memories. I appreciate that Janet thought of me. But I kind of deep down knew that I would not like sending those emails, though perhaps folk would be happy to receive them….

I know that at least two bloggers were pleased that I thought of them and that makes me feel good…. or at least not-bad! So I look forward still to hearing from Diane Prokop and Trish at weebookblog. You’re better sports than I am ladies!

Anyway… Thus concludes my latest anxiety attack about the silliest of things. This particular post probably gives you more insight into the ‘wonder’ that is Deborah than the Eleven Things About Me piece.

Thanks for listening folks 🙂 x

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§ 9 Responses to Sheesh!

  • Anne J Steves says:

    I know how you feel Deborah. As a visual artist my least favourite part is the art opening. Making contact with others in the desperate desire to have more shows seems to cheapen the work sometimes…although when someone is genuinely interested it is very exciting

    • It’s a tricky thing. I think humility always shows through so I do think there is a way to say “hey, look at what I did!” and still be a credible, pleasant and noble human being. And you HAVE to be excited about your work. That’s the thing. If you’re not then no-one else will be usually. Yes, a tricky line indeed…

  • Jim Brennan says:

    This post reminded me why I follow your blog-you’re so damn honest, and witty. Don’t chane a thing and readers will follow.

  • inkandpages says:

    You are obviously a very conscientious and genuine person. I just want you to know how refreshing that is in an uncaring world. Never change.

  • weebookblog says:

    Hi Deborah,
    Once again you’ve nailed a sentiment I can relate to (and it appears I’m not the only one). Although I’m not a forwarding Liebsterite, your connection and encouragement was timed to perfection.
    I enjoyed reading what you shared on the Liebster blog and all your writing, so this has been a part of the whole to date!
    And I’ll keep blogging, albeit at snails pace because there is some communal setting for me to anchor into now.
    Btw have you read ‘The Sound of a Wild Snail Eating’ by Elizabeth Tova Bailey. Maybe snails are onto something and that is also encouraging. The book has a physical health context but for any writer struggling with patience and perseverance, this is a grounding (and uplifting) read.

  • Hi there would you mind letting me know which web host you’re utilizing? I’ve loaded your blog in 3 different web browsers and I must say this blog loads
    a lot quicker then most. Can you recommend a good internet hosting provider at a honest price?
    Thanks a lot, I appreciate it!

  • I’m extremely impressed with your writing skills as well as with the layout on your blog. Is this a paid theme or did you customize it yourself? Anyway keep up the nice quality writing, it is rare to see a nice blog like this one these days.

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